On The Frontline With Boma
“The elders say that when hunger persists in a home, peace quietly packs its bags. Another African proverb reminds us that a hungry stomach has no ears. Yet another says that a man whose roof leaks in every season will eventually forget how beautiful the stars are. These sayings are not invitations to excuse wrongdoing; they are enduring reminders that prolonged deprivation can cloud judgment, inflame emotions and weaken the very bonds that hold families together.”
Across Nigeria today, these ancient words echo with unsettling relevance. Stories of domestic violence, child abuse, suicide, murder and other desperate acts now dominate conversations in homes, markets and workplaces before eventually flooding social media. Some reports are exaggerated, others are deliberately fabricated, but far too many are heartbreakingly real. Collectively, they paint the picture of a nation wrestling with immense social and economic pressures.
One such disturbing report emerged recently from Aba, Abia State, one of Nigeria’s foremost commercial cities. According to widely circulated reports, a man allegedly threw his two children from the upper floor of a storey building during a violent altercation with his wife. The reports further indicate that while allegedly attempting to push his wife from the same building, he reportedly lost his balance, fell, struck his head and became unconscious. Thankfully, the children survived and are receiving medical attention, while the circumstances surrounding the incident remain under investigation by the appropriate authorities.
If the allegations are ultimately confirmed, Nigerians would once again be confronted with a painful question: what is happening to our homes?
There was a time when the Nigerian family, despite economic limitations, remained the country’s strongest institution. Parents made sacrifices without drawing attention to themselves. Neighbours watched over one another’s children. Families settled disputes around the dining table instead of before police investigators. Today, many households appear to be carrying burdens that are becoming increasingly difficult to bear.
It would be simplistic to attribute every case of domestic violence to poverty. Human behaviour is shaped by many factors, including temperament, substance abuse, unresolved psychological conditions, relationship conflicts and personal choices. Yet it would also be naïve to ignore the enormous pressure that worsening economic conditions can place on already fragile households.
Over the past several years, Nigerians have endured one of the most difficult economic periods in recent memory. The removal of fuel subsidy, exchange-rate reforms, persistent inflation and rising food prices have dramatically increased the cost of living. While government officials continue to argue that these reforms are necessary to stabilise the economy over the long term, many ordinary citizens remain preoccupied with a more immediate concern: surviving today.
Markets that once bustled with purchasing power now witness customers buying food in tiny quantities simply to get through another day. Parents who previously provided three meals daily now struggle to afford one nutritious meal. Salaries that once sustained families disappear almost immediately after they are paid. Small businesses battle declining patronage while transport fares, school fees, electricity costs and house rents continue their relentless upward climb.
Perhaps no theory illustrates this reality better than Abraham Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs. Maslow argued that physiological needs—food, water and shelter—form the foundation upon which every other human aspiration rests. When these basic needs are consistently threatened, anxiety, frustration and emotional instability often follow. A hungry individual does not easily concentrate on higher ideals of fulfilment, creativity or self-actualisation because survival becomes the overriding concern.
This does not mean that hunger automatically transforms law-abiding citizens into violent offenders. Millions of Nigerians face severe hardship every day without raising a hand against another person. Nevertheless, prolonged deprivation can deepen frustration, intensify family conflicts and aggravate existing mental health challenges. When combined with untreated psychological distress or explosive anger, the consequences can become tragic.
Mental health remains one of Nigeria’s least discussed public health challenges. Depression, anxiety disorders, emotional exhaustion and other psychological conditions frequently go undiagnosed because many people fear social stigma or cannot afford professional care. Too often, individuals suffer in silence until their pain manifests in destructive ways. The nation must begin to treat mental health with the same seriousness it accords physical illness.
Against this backdrop came President Bola Ahmed Tinubu’s recent remark that hunger existed in Nigeria even before he was born. Whether intended as a historical observation or an attempt to reassure Nigerians that hardship is not new, many citizens interpreted the statement differently. For families struggling daily to put food on the table, such remarks sounded detached from their lived realities.
Leadership extends beyond announcing economic reforms and unveiling policy frameworks. It also requires empathy. Words spoken by leaders carry enormous weight, particularly during periods of national hardship. They can inspire hope or deepen despair; reassure anxious citizens or widen the emotional distance between government and the governed. At a time when countless Nigerians are making painful choices between food, medication, school fees and transportation, compassion should remain the first language of public leadership.
This is not to suggest that every social problem confronting Nigeria can be laid at the feet of government. Families also have responsibilities. Communities have responsibilities. Religious institutions, traditional rulers, professional bodies and civil society organisations all have vital roles in rebuilding the social fabric. Parents must learn healthier ways of resolving conflicts. Couples experiencing unbearable marital strain should seek counselling, mediation or lawful separation rather than violence. Anger must never become a licence to destroy innocent lives.
If investigations confirm the allegations surrounding the Aba incident, the alleged attempt to harm innocent children would represent not only a criminal act but also a profound moral failure. No child should ever become a victim of disputes between adults. Children depend entirely upon their parents for protection, affection and guidance. When those entrusted with their care become the source of danger, society itself suffers.
Nigerian law takes a serious view of acts that threaten the lives and welfare of children. The Child Rights Act affirms that every child has the right to survival, development, protection and dignity. Likewise, criminal laws provide penalties for violent offences, including attempted unlawful killing and grievous assaults. These provisions exist because every civilised society recognises that the family should be a sanctuary, not a battlefield.
Yet legislation alone cannot solve this growing crisis. Courts can punish offenders after the damage has been done, but they cannot restore a child’s shattered sense of safety or erase traumatic memories. Prevention remains far better than punishment.
Government therefore has an obligation to pursue economic policies that not only promise future prosperity but also cushion present suffering. Social intervention programmes should reach genuinely vulnerable households efficiently and transparently. Job creation must move beyond political slogans into measurable reality. Access to affordable mental healthcare should be expanded through primary healthcare centres and community outreach initiatives. Faith-based organisations and community associations should also intensify counselling services for distressed families before disagreements escalate into violence.
The Aba incident, tragic as it appears, should therefore serve as more than another viral social media story destined to disappear beneath tomorrow’s headlines. It should provoke national introspection. It should compel us to ask whether we are paying sufficient attention to the silent burdens carried by millions of Nigerians whose frustrations rarely make the news until catastrophe strikes.
For the man at the centre of these allegations, if indeed the reports are proven true, the lesson should be profound. Life has apparently offered him another opportunity. The survival of the children is a blessing that should inspire deep remorse, sincere repentance and a commitment to become the father they deserve rather than the father they fear. No disappointment, debt, anger or frustration can justify turning one’s family into the target of violence.
As Nigerians, we must never allow hardship to redefine our humanity. Economic adversity may test our patience, but it must never extinguish our compassion. Hunger may empty the stomach, but it must not empty the conscience. Frustration may knock at our doors, but we must never permit it to become the landlord of our homes.
For when hunger enters a nation, governments must respond with wisdom. When anger enters a family, society must respond with compassion. But when violence enters the home, every Nigerian has a duty to say firmly and without hesitation that enough is enough.
On The Frontline With Boma is published by The Port Harcourt Telegraph Newspaper authored by the managing editor
